How was the first time I had to hide from incoming missiles
The siren echoed.
For the first time in my life, I was being warned that missiles were heading in my way: not a great first timer, I must confess. There’s such a raw and close to indescribable power that takes you completely in this kind of moment… Heart rate boosts, adrenaline reaches it’s peak, eyes are wide open, everything seems to move in slow motion, straight out of some Matrix movie. Next step is forgetting: who you are, what you were doing, talking, overthinking, possibly being anxious about. In the end, it all comes to survival instincts and the thrill to get, as fast and orderly as possible, to the closest safe place — which, in my case, was a “panic room” inside the apartment.
Suddenly there was I, dividing the space with six other men, my flatmates, looking incredulously into each others eyes, as explosions could be heard a few hundreds of meters away. One of those explosions was followed by an acute, brief, yet terrifying scream.
And than came the silence.
The last time Tel Aviv residents had to seek shelter because of falling bombs was, approximately, seven years ago. I’m here for over a month only, and already had to experience this exceptional situation. Bad luck? It’s impossible to categorize the raising social tension between palestinians and israelis as a simple act of fate. There are many circumstances and layers, political decisions and interests, deep and complicated history that you can’t absorb from a simple, obviously biased, infographic found on internet.
The routine of sirens and bombs persisted for a couple of days, specially during dawn. In Tel Aviv, they seem to have disappeared so far, even though rockets are still being launched at other parts of the country from Gaza, Lebanon, and most lately, Syria.
“Aren’t you terrified?”
I’ve heard this question a couple of times in the last few days. First of all, I’m brazilian, from Rio. This might sound a bit crazy, but even with bombs flying all over the skies and all the escalating animosity between the population, I feel safer here, more than I ever felt while walking in Copacabana at night (or any time of the day, for that matter). Furthermore, I’m in a cosmopolitan, progressive, tech-friendly, future-oriented, covid-free city. Nothing alike Bolsonaro’s Brazil.
Is it traumatic to witness missiles meant to kill you exploding nearby? It surely is. Nevertheless, the shock of reality powered by living in a place so closer to my belief of how a welfare state should behave is way, way bigger.
I’m an idealist for sure, one who believes in “absurd fables”, such as the peace in the Middle East and peaceful coexistence between palestinians and israelis. They may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.
My plans remain the same. I want to stay.
